26 August 2011 @ 12:00 am
Title: Unpacked
Author: [livejournal.com profile] omen1x2
Rating: R
Fandom: DBSK/TVXQ/JYJ
Pairing: JaeChun, YooSu!bffery, slight MinSu, luggage cart!JaeChunSu
Disclaimer: Like all fanfic writers, I twist reality to please me.
Summary: For [livejournal.com profile] k_inthetrunk and [livejournal.com profile] jaechun07, who requested more Baggage!verse. Yoochun’s dense. Jaejoong is desperate. Junsu’s hilarious.




Unpacked
By Omen-chan




Yoochun whined miserably. Damn it, he was on Jaejoong’s bed, ready, willing, and naked, and Jaejoong wasn’t even looking at him. It was enough to lower anyone’s self-confidence.

“Jaeeeee… What are you doing all the way over theeeeeere…?” Yoochun had it on good authority that his pouts were formidable, and he was using one in full force now. Of course, it would probably have a lot more punch if Jaejoong would just look at him.

He felt himself wilt at the lack of attention and looked down at himself. Erection gone. Erection wasted. Jaejoong better have a damn good explanation for this. Yoochun sat up, angry and frustrated and ready to throw something. He had a choice between a pillow and the lube on the bedside table.

He threw the lube.

“Ow!” Satisfyingly, Jaejoong turned around to look at him. Too late, of course, but at least Yoochun no longer felt like the invisible man. “What the fuck, Yoochun?”

“More like ‘What the NO fuck!’ You’ve been ignoring me since I got here!”

“What? Am I a dildo? A sex toy ready-for-use when needed?”

“Of course not!” Yoochun paused. “Hmmm… Kim Jaejoong sex toy… I think I should market that. I’d make a fortune.”

Instead of laughing, Jaejoong just rolled his eyes and turned right back around, ignoring him yet again.

Yoochun threw the pillow.

“Aaaaah! What?!”

“You’re ignoring me. I don’t like it.”

Jaejoong sighed and grabbed Yoochun’s clothes from the floor and tossed them at him. “Get dressed. You’re distracting me.”

“I thought that was the idea.”

“I don’t feel like having sex with you, all right?”

Flabbergasted, Yoochun started pulling on his clothes.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“How long have we been having sex?”

Yoochun stared at him blankly. “What, today? Because we haven’t had any yet and it’s all your fault.”

Jaejoong’s look would have withered Yoochun if he hadn’t already done so. “Altogether, Yoochun. Do you know how long we’ve been having sex? How many days? Weeks? Months?”

Twiddling his thumbs, Yoochun’s look, if anything, just got blanker. “Um?”

“Four months and two weeks.”

“Okay?”

Jaejoong threw his hands up, exasperated. “Four months and two weeks of sex in this room.”

Yoochun wondered when Jaejoong was going to start making sense. “I really don’t see what-”

“I’m aware of that. Just go away.”

And Yoochun didn’t get any that night.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“Geez, Yoochun, what happened?”

“Nothing happened. Why should anything have happened?” Yoochun growled. “What the fuck makes you think that anything has fucking happened?”

Junsu’s eyes widened and he held his hands out as if to placate a wild animal. “Whoa, there, buddy. How about we not kill the best friend for no reason?” He paused. “Well, at least, there’s no reason right now. Unless you found that dead cockroach I put in your shoe.”

Yoochun’s face went pasty as he tripped over himself in his effort to get out of his shoes.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“I hate you.”

“Oh, come on. It’s not like I actually did it.”

Yoochun rubbed his forehead, where a new bruise was beginning to form. “I hit my head against the luggage cart, you dick.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault you’re a little girl. At least this time you didn’t scream. Jaejoong must be manning you up slightly.”

At the mention of his lover and possibly current ex, Yoochun suddenly started to tear up. He reached out to clutch at his best friend.

Junsu sighed and patted Yoochun’s back just as Yoochun started to wail. “Oh, here we go…”

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“And he’s mad at me and I don’t know why and he wouldn’t have sex with me or even look at me and I think he hates me and I don’t know whyyyyyyy!” Blubbering over the last word, he used Junsu’s shirt as a handkerchief. He could get the snot and tears cleaned off it later.

“Did he say anything? Or was it just that time of the month?”

Yoochun pulled away to blink at him. “What?”

“Sorry. That’s my usual excuse for why your exes act weird. But then, you’re the one that’s crying, so maybe it’s yours?”

Yoochun barely even caught the slur to his manhood. “E-ex?”

Junsu sighed and discreetly checked his watch as Yoochun started another loud stream of waterworks.

He hadn’t really felt like working today anyway.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“Okay. Calmed down now?”

Yoochun sniffed and nodded. At least the tears were currently on hold.

“Ready to tell me exactly what happened?”

Yoochun’s lower lip shook, but he managed to maintain his demeanor.

“Ready to tell me what he said? He did say something, right?”

Yoochun nodded again.

“What did he say?” Junsu asked patiently.

“It didn’t… really make sense.”

“I see.” Junsu sighed. “Please tell me what he said anyway.”

“He, um, told me to put my clothes on because I was distracting him. And somewhere in there I got the idea that I should mass-market a Kim Jaejoong sex toy.”

Nearly choking as he held back a laugh, Junsu asked, “Really?”

“Yeah. And then he asked me how long we’d been together.”

“Oh, okay. And you told him?”

“Well, no. I couldn’t remember. It’d been a while, though.”

Junsu heroically refrained from rolling his eyes. “No kidding.”

“And then he made a point of mentioning his room for no reason.”

“I’m sure.”

“And then…” Yoochun’s eyes welled up again. “H-he told me to l-leave…”

Junsu reached over and pinched Yoochun’s nose. “I think you’re the world’s biggest moron.”

Successfully distracted, Yoochun exclaimed in a high-pitched voice, “Hey!”

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


Yoochun had tossed and turned all night as he tried to come up with a reason, an idea, an anything. His brilliant solution had been his old fallback.

“Hey, there, beautiful,” Yoochun grinned as he leaned against the counter and chatted up a new maid. However, in the apparent running theme of this week, she didn’t even look at him. He wondered if he was out of practice.

He turned to try another one. “Are you new here, sweetheart? I think I’d have noticed you before…”

Someone grabbed his shoulder. He barely had time to turn before he saw the hand coming.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“Owwwwww…”

“Shut up and hold still, you moron.”

They were in Jaejoong’s hotel room, first aid kit beside them on the bed. Despite all logic, Yoochun was happy. At least Jaejoong was paying attention to him again. Sex would have been preferred to a slap, but Yoochun would take what he could get.

“Kiss it and make it better?” Yoochun asked with a smile, completely ignoring the twinge in his cheek as it dimpled.

Jaejoong stared at him in utter disbelief. “Are you kidding me? The last thing I feel like doing right now is kissing you.”

Pouting, Yoochun pulled his legs up and tucked his chin on his knees. “Yeah, I got that. What’d I do?”

Sputtering, Jaejoong briefly considered slapping Yoochun’s other cheek. “You were flirting, you asshole!”

“No, I meant before that. You were ignoring me, and then you were mad at me, and then you kicked me out. I know why you slapped me, but I wanna know why you’re mad at me.” His lower lip started trembling again.

Jaejoong sighed and reached over to apply a bandage to Yoochun’s cheek. “You really don’t know?”

“No… Should I? Did I do something wrong?” Yoochun swallowed, and asked the question he’d been avoiding thinking about all night. “Are you tired of me?”

Anger wilting completely, Jaejoong moved closer and kissed him. Honestly, no one should be that cute. “Of course I’m not tired of you. I just… was beginning to wonder what you want me for.”

Yoochun’s brow furrowed. “What?”

“I mean, all we do is have sex.”

Flabbergasted once again, Yoochun gasped, “Are you tired of having sex?!” His eyes glazed over as he tried to wrap his mind around this alien concept.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


A few weeks later, Jaejoong tried another approach.

“Soooo…” he began as he started rubbing Yoochun’s back.

“Hmmmm so?” Yoochun’s brain and tongue always melted when Jaejoong gave him a massage.

“I’m getting kind of tired of this room.”

Yoochun’s response was somewhere between a purr and an incomprehensible word.

Jaejoong decided to take it as encouragement. “So I’ve been thinking of moving.”

“Mmmmmhmmmmm…”

“What do you think?”

There was a long pause.

“Yoochun?” Jaejoong asked hopefully. Maybe Yoochun was finally thinking about it!

A muffled snore emanated from the pillow.

Jaejoong seriously considered hitting him again.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


I need your help.

Junsu frowned down at the text on his phone, and then frowned up at his date as he considered which of the two were more important.

The girl rubbed her cheek. “What’s wrong? Something on my face?”

Junsu wondered how badly he would get slapped for ditching a girl to help his gay male best friend’s boyfriend.

Only one way to find out, really.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“Junsu? What happened to your face?”

“Interesting experiment gone horribly wrong. What’s up?” Junsu asked as he sat at the café table across from his friend.

Jaejoong gave him a weird look, but decided to ignore whatever strange mischief Junsu had been getting up to. “Yoochun’s being an idiot.”

“No kidding,” Junsu deadpanned. Honestly, had Jaejoong really called him here just to state the obvious?

“I’ve been trying to give him hints, but they just go straight past him.”

Junsu sighed and reached over the table to pat Jaejoong’s hand. “Jaejoongie, Yoochun is not like you or me. He doesn’t do ‘hints’ well.”

“I can’t just tell him I’m going to move in with him! I’m just trying to work him around so he’ll ask!”

“Hmmm…” Junsu tapped his chin with his finger. “You remember how I got you to ride a luggage cart the first time?”

“What? No. I decided to do it all on my own.”

“That’s what you think. I told you I had a bad break-up, right?”

Jaejoong blinked and thought back on it. He did vaguely remember something like that, so he nodded slowly.

“I lied.”

“Huh?”

“Yoochun was, like, a crazy-obsessed fan of yours, and after the Luggage Cart Disaster of 2011 Part One, he showed me about a million photos and articles about you on his phone, including all the craziness over your bad break-up with The Fucker Dude.”

Jaejoong choked on his coffee as he tried not to laugh.

“And you seemed, like, half depressed and half desperate for a laugh, so I sort of implanted the idea that riding a luggage cart would be great for the recently brokenhearted.”

“I see…” Jaejoong tapped his coffee cup with his forefinger as he processed this new information.

“I also thought it’d be great fun to set you up with Yoochun so that he could get some.”

Jaejoong raised an eyebrow.

“From you, I mean. Might make him stop sleeping around so I could finally start hitting on girls successfully.”

“Are you always so devious?”

“Hey, I only look clueless! Makes it that much easier for me to manipulate people. Yoochun is clueless, so he should be that much easier to manipulate.”

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


Yoochun had a feeling something was wrong the second Jaejoong opened the door. “Um?”

Jaejoong tilted his head and gave a smile that was pure seduction. “Yes?”

“Could you repeat that, please?”

“I said that I thought it would be nice to go for a ride.”

Yoochun nodded. This part at least made sense.

“In a luggage cart.”

Yoochun frowned. This part did not make sense. “Uh. In that?” He pointed obviously at Jaejoong’s apparel.

Jaejoong tightened the sash of his red robe, but did nothing for the exposed shoulder as the top began to slip.

Or lack thereof, Yoochun amended silently.

“Is there a problem with what I’m wearing, Yoochunnie?”

“Uh…” Yoochun wondered when his speech capabilities had gone on leave without warning him. He swallowed and tried again, “Outside?”

“Well, in the hallway, obviously. I doubt Shim Changmin sshi will allow us to ride one outside.”

“In that?”

Jaejoong pouted and started playing with the ends of his sash. “I already asked if there was something wrong with what I was wearing…”

Yoochun stared wide-eyed as Jaejoong stepped into the hallway. The robe was short enough that he could see up to the middle of his lover’s thigh when he walked, and it was deeply distracting.

Jaejoong gave a sigh as he walked down the hallway to climb onto the nearest luggage cart, apparently oblivious of the open hotel room door and the occupants taking pictures with their phones. He just turned and flung a smile over his shoulder at Yoochun, “Honestly, I never get to wear this robe anymore.”

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“Junsu, I have a problem!” Yoochun paused as he looked at Junsu’s newest acquisition. “Go away.”

The girl glared. “Excuse me?”

“He’s not interested in you anyway.”

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


Yoochun sat down in the girl’s newly vacated chair, one cheek slightly redder than the other. He didn’t seem to care. “I think Jaejoong has lost his mind.”

Junsu hid a smile behind his hand for a moment, before returning his face to a mildly curious expression. “Oh?”

“He’s taken to wandering around the hotel half naked!”

“Sounds more like a generous present to the masses to me.”

“Junsu!”

“You’re probably just jealous.”

“Of course I’m jealous! I don’t want people ogling him!”

“Tough luck, buddy. He’s famous.”

I know that!” Yoochun bellowed. “But it’s one thing to have people ogling him onstage, and another thing completely to have them ogling his skin at the hotel! That’s my time! My skin! My Jaejoong!”

“Oh, come on. You can’t begrudge him the chance to feel at home where he’s living, can you?”

“Wha-?”

“He’s been living at that hotel for five months now. You practically live there with him. He’s just treating it like a home!” Junsu said brightly.

“Oh, fuck that shit. Seriously.”

Junsu laughed and pushed himself away from the table. “Come on, buddy. I think you need a nice ride to clear your thoughts.”

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


Junsu invited Jaejoong.

And of course, Jaejoong was freshly showered as he answered the door in his towel, and decided he didn’t feel like wasting the time to get dressed.

Yoochun had a very, very bad feeling as his boyfriend, clad only in a towel, skipped down the hallway with his best friend.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“I am very disappointed in all of you.” Shim Changmin, hotel manager and Yoochun’s and Junsu’s difficult boss, glared at them all in bitter disappointment, reflecting his words.

The three of them hung their heads.

“You have broken a fifth luggage cart.”

Junsu scuffed his shoe.

“One of you was barely decent.”

Yoochun shot a glare at Jaejoong from the corner of his eye.

“And when that luggage cart tipped over, Kim Jaejoong sshi’s towel slipped and he ended up flashing half a dozen guests. I was barely able to convince them not to call the police.”

Jaejoong’s cheeks flared red at the memory.

“All of this, and you didn’t even give me the courtesy of an invitation.”

The three of them all looked up hopefully.

“Yoochun, Jaejoong, you may go.” He waved them away imperiously and the two scooted away like berated schoolboys. “Junsu, I would like a word.”

Junsu winced and looked back down at the ground, wondering if he was actually about to be fired.

“I hear you’ve been asking out every single female employee and dropping her on the first date. These women, of course, are severely upset.”

Junsu nodded miserably.

“As am I.”

Junsu wanted to melt into the floor.

“If you were that desperate for my attention, you should have just asked.”

Junsu barely managed to keep from grinning. Manipulation Plan #415: Successful.

~ ♦ ~ ♦ ~


“I think your boss is the scariest man on earth.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure he has about fifty bodies hidden in his house,” Yoochun replied as he took off his own shirt to hand to Jaejoong.

Jaejoong bit his lip and looked at the pink shirt before shrugging and putting it on. He would just have to accept that his plan had completely failed, and all he had acquired out of the whole ordeal was humiliation, and some interesting pictures added to his fansites.

As they reached Jaejoong’s hotel room door, Yoochun paused and gave Jaejoong a long look. “You better not go streaking in public ever again.”

“I won’t.”

“You’re only allowed to streak at home.”

Jaejoong sighed and nodded and opened his door.

“So pack your things already. I want to watch that naked butt strut around my apartment every day.”

Blinking, Jaejoong turned to look at him in surprise. “Um?”

Yoochun grinned, pleased that his verbal idiocy had apparently been caught by Jaejoong. “Well, our apartment now, I guess. I just hope you don’t mind having pictures of yourself staring at you from the walls.”

“…”

“I guess I could take them down…”

“… No, that’s okay.”




~fin~




A/N: I may or may not do a lemon-y epilogue. Haven’t decided yet. *takes a lesson from Junsu’s book and tries a little manipulation* Depends on how much people want me to, I guess. ^^


Back to: Baggage

On to sequel: Settled In
 
 
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